we've reached the level in our friendship where i don't think he would rape me
i'm so desperate for a drink right now i looked up the recipe to make pruno
Should I shave my pubes in the shape of a top hat so I can nickname my junk Abe Lincoln?
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
I forgot to tell you thank you for putting me out when I was on fire. im sure I'll laught about this someday...
I was stumbling so much, men walking behind us were shouting "don't hit the pole! don't hit the pole!" whenever I was near a telephone pole.
These days, you and me are swimming in dicks.
Marco
Polo
i know i should keep better track of the things that i put in your vagina but i've put so many things in there it's hard to keep track
Passed out mid cig in bed last night. Thank you cough for allowing me legal prescription hydrocodone.
Just blowing bubbles with my nipple rings in my shower.
You always make things weird.
Just thinking about this summer makes me feel a slight tingle of an orgasm mixed with a twinge of regret as the cold ghostly feeling of multiple hangovers creep into my body.
Romantically speaking, I want to sit on his face.
She was doing hand motions and used straws from drinks like those airport light batons to have me back my "747 jumbo dick" towards you.
I fought a guy last night because he said "extra pulp orange juice is the best orange juice"
So i dislocated my knee but still went home and fucked his brains out. Nothing gets in the way of my sex life. NOTHING.
Randomize
