In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
She's got an ass you could write the declaration of independence on in one line. Takes up three bar stools.
just walked into the room and her sister said loudly, "do him, or I will."
Home remedy for the herp. Black tea. I need to strap teabags to my wang.
There's a fried egg and an empty bottle of reddiwhip in the parking lot. Did you have fun last night?
i officially have over $300 in my bank account. that's a year's worth of chipotle.
I think I'm crying more because after all these years he never learned to spell you or use a comma properly from me
I've found my soulmate with the cardboard Dos Equis man.
I woke up to a stripper (who added me on Facebook) messaging me reminding me to cancel my card if I can't find it
I only want to come over for sex and blueberry pancakes
I totally have a huge crush on him though which is fucking up my "classy she-demon with limited feelings" vibe
THANKS BE TO BLACK BABY JESUS IN HIS LITTLE GOLDEN DIAPER FOR BLESSING ME WITH NOT PREGNANT
She paid me 300 bucks to spank her and call her Baby Jane. Then we drank half a bottle of sippin whiskey. I'd call it a twelve out of ten.
Hey remind me the get the pancakes out of my jacket
He is saved in her phone as Sir. Mindfuck <3/ vag cleaner of course I need to meet him.
Randomize
