You look at her and you just know the only action she's gotten is from her tampon..
I kind of feel like guidos are mythical creatures.
If a man's penis is referred to as "the family jewels" does that make a woman's vagina a jewelry box?
Dude my triple a card is good for bail. This is like a real live get out of jail free card
Sorry for making you give strangers a ride for hits of acid.
We decided to cut you off after you insisted on eating peanuts by the dumpster
mallory made a planned parenthood decision maker flow chart again.
Bailey. He has a soul patch. Idgaf if he was an NFL player. Nobody with a soul patch is attractive.
Yes. That was the exact moment of my conscience clicking into instant high alert.
I told him I was gunna have sex with him in both of our cars at the same time.
Idk what I'm more afraid of...checking my bank account or my STD results.
There are condoms rolled onto each bunny ear of the ears I was wearing last night
His favorite positions involve choking me out. I'm marrying him.
I'm SO high. And there is so much pudding in this car
Sorry I didn't have my phone all night. Did we hang last night?
You bit me
Oh lord I need to hear this story
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