the ugly redhead just came into the bar, wearing a sombrero...by herself... who is going to tell her that its not cool to throw themed parties when you're the only guest?
I just took a girl with a hip brace and crutches on a date. she obviously can't bone. is it rude to demand a blowjob?
What the hell am I supposed to do with 50 gallons of mayo?
I would drag my balls through a mile of broken glass to eat pudding out of her anus
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Come here. I'm drunk. Family Function. Intense Pro-life vs. Pro-choice debate. Bring Republicans.
It was great. Even bought me breakfast in the AM
From?
Well, he didn't exactly take me out, but left a $20 on the table...
Well, we missed our public lewdness court date. Looks like were going to jail in Alabama ...
you tipped EVERY employee at white castle
She started acting like she was actually a deaf person...so I went along with it and acted like her interpreter. I don't think anyone bought it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sometimes I wonder how different my life would be if I didn't share a weekly margarita with my mom since i was 12
Tell him next time im gonna be "disgrace to the family" drunk
So we have also come to the conclusion that slam piece Saturday's are the appropriate follow ups to find a husband Fridays
I feel like as your wife, as cool with your decision-making skills as I usually am, there should be a bigger explanation to you adopting a child while I'm in Houston.
we had break-up sex in a port-a-potty. how do you think it went?!
Alive.
So much puke
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