I'm playing the sound guy on a porno set
I look like a poor person in the cast of Gay Oliver.
I feel like you just avenged me for every guy who came in my hair
I might not be able to enter cuba but that doesn't mean that a cuban can't enter me
I just ate nachos topless with a fork. Live with meeee
Okay I woke up in my room, snuggie on, had a water bottle in my hand my tv was on Disney channel and my cigarettes are gone. And I deleted every text in my phone but one that said 'you are absolutely welcome'
His dad asked what he was doing so he texted his FATHER a picture of me wearing his shirt in his bed.
Legitimate concern. Who am I going to have birthday sex with?
I just want a pillowcase full of fast food so I can eat and sleep this hangover away
WHEN DO I FOLLOW THESE PEOPLE. I WOKE UP THIS MORNING &FOUND TWEETS FROM ILLUMINATI AND "hot shot 6th grader"
You know you're a fat kid when you've spent half the day having a twitter conversation with Pizza Hut.
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
I'm experimenting with sincerity
He ate me out while watching Fifty Shades of Grey---needless to say I'm locking this down
I know you would never do it--but if I ever walk into your house and find a "live love laugh" ANYTHING, I will commit you to an asylum. If it is a vinyl decal adhered to the wall, I will just smother you myself.
Randomize
