I bet they all look and smell like Amy Winehouse
I will show your tits more attention than Michael Jackson's death.
There is a mermaid on oprah and she looks nothin like ariel
he asked me out through an event invitation on facebook, the title read Romantic Dinner For 2
ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
someone needs to make a hangover cure that isn't cocaine.
No. I didn't know. I thought mid afternoon shots meant the day could only get better.
So I know we're not talking about this anymore buuuuuut I left heel marks on the wall.
Now I don't feel so bad about telling everyone that he's 23 and needs Viagra. It's her problem now
i gave up on the vacation being fun the night i ate all the marshamallows out of the lucky charms while everyone else was having sex in the condo
Do drug dealers work on Memorial Day?
This Pinterest wedding planning is a good distraction. I'm great at this, my imaginary wedding is beautiful
Was just messaged by someone in a Power Ranger suit on OkCupid... Figured you would approve
I'm sorry for getting drunk and throwing a robo-bird at you.
How's Vegas?
Woke up with a sculpture of my own head. Been trying to find Ashley for two days. so pretty not too bad.
Randomize
