belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
just went onto Yahoo and the featured article had a picture of one of the Jonas brothers. last two times the featured article was a celebrity's face the headline was "Michael Jackson is Dead" and "Pitchman Billy Mays is Dead" so naturally I got a little excited. Turns out he's just engaged. Who gives a fuck.
Why I am the classiest girl you know: just mixed drinks for everyone on the baby changing station at the movie theater.
my ex just saw me in his brothers bed. fuck yes revenge feels good
i think i was tempted to text while we were making out. like i remember holding my phone up behind his head and just staring at it.
Sorry about that whole "setting your deck on fire" thing.
Time to do stuff I know I'll have to hide from my grandkids one day and everyone at next weekends wedding.
If she makes a move, pretend to have a seizure.
Psh a bachelors degree is the new adulthood. We're all just pretending anyways. I'm sitting on my boyfriends couch while he's passed out drunk. In my lap. On a Wednesday. And he's a nurse. See, pretending to be an adult
I am almost positive I asked to milk her when I was saying my goodbyes.
I am the prescription. I can be taken orally or vaginally and in any dosage. This is why I went to med school.
Never thought an ATM max withdrawal could be such a good thing...
Starting this Monday as I always do
With a desperate plea for help
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
Eh, I don't question what my penis likes. It just does what it does.
Randomize
