i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
so then you didnt wanna fuck tonight right?
oops, you werent supposed to get that until you left.
I am in a vortex of obligation.
There is something about drinking on a golf course and getting with younger women that just really makes me feel at home.
Just spun two beer bottles and Placed them in my pockets perfect... I feel like the clint eastwood of drunks
mom and dad sent me an easter basket full of beer pong supplies again.
I really hope our interview with channel 6 last night doesn't air or else my parents are gona get a first hand look at my alcohol problem
One question: Why is your trash can full of blood and pop-tarts?
Why were you having sex on top of my left over pizza in the kitchen?
rollerskate sex sounded like a good idea...
Lol yeah. Because I just woke him up to blow him for being hot.
It's your birthday, you should get to jizz where you want to. Jizz when you want tooo
HIS DICK IS SO AWESOME DUDE. 15/10 SURPRISE
So unofficially, he told me he deleted tinder because of me. I think that's a pretty romantic gesture in 2018.
Intoxication Level: I'm as graceful and flawless as a fucking dinosaur.
Randomize
