whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
took shots out of a medicine cup. i can get used to college.
Why am I getting the stink eye from these people? They're acting like BYOB isn't kosher in a laundromat.
The woman exiting the men's room tried convincing me she was actually a good-looking man.
She put up a picture of her grandmother on facebook, looks like the lazy eye runs in the family
when i went to the store to buy my pregnancy test they were giving carnations to all the moms and they gave me one and said "just in case"
Trying to low-key throw up in the ocean is harder than it seems.
I'm alone drinking at the bar and the titanic theme song is on. This won't end well.
They make twin pack pregnancy tests for girls like us
Lol what? Monday night impromptu acid drop was the alternative.
He's drunk and I'm pain-killer high and we're about to watch fireworks at disney world. It's gonna be fucking magical
I told her my hands felt like they touched the sun, never been that stoned before
Did you really have to freak out and get up half way through to put the cat in the closet?
...
It was like a baby arm holding another baby arm holding an apple grove. Fuckin huge!
He thought reverse cowgirl meant he dressed up as a cowgirl. Honestly, it was more creepy than funny
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