I have a masturbator in my 5th grade class. the teacher told me ever since they caught him humping the desk in 2nd grade, they haven't been able to control him. he's even on medication but he will just do it in class
I promise you 4 toothbrushes taped together and lube does not do the trick
Cops showed up at 4 am to address a noise complaint and she called them pussies for not doing shots with us.
i cant remember past the part when we filled his tub with skittles.
The stoners next door have their couch on the sidewalk again, shirtless, soaking their feet in a baby pool and listening to loud ukulele music. I want their life.
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
Nothing like a 3am firealarm to kick a booty call out...
it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.
I think I shall call his penis Gatsby. We talk about it all the time, but I never see it.
I just watched a stripper purchase $43 of Rockstar and corn nuts. Godamnit! We need helmet cams.
We compared her boobs to bacon. I'm probably going to have to justify that.
We are all done wearing pants today
6 showers laters and I still feel like I have his vomit in my vagina. At least I could help him figure out he's gay.
yeah but really his dick tasted like soap. like i was blowing a bar of soap
If I get really high and watch Beauty and The Beast on our Netflx account, will you judge me?
Only if you start before I get home!
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