Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
I dont understand how a fully grown man could convince himself that lime green crocks would look good on him.
i went to throw her on my bed and threw her straight in to my bike
I Apparently saved a picture of the Eiffel tower in between 2 pics of his dick. It appears to be the same size. I fucking love Paris.
We snorted a line of cocaine and xanax, and then played a game of Backgammon. It was surprisingly therapeutic.
Thanks in advance for a great weekend. Sorry your roommates are going to hate you after I leave. They need to loosen up anyways.
Why is there a keg in our kitchen? I'm not complaining but why is there a keg in our kitchen?
I don't care how stoned you are, I'm not driving to a different state for a burrito
lesson #1 of freshman year: grinding with a sombrero is difficult
It was only funny because some guy across the street was getting his mail and he just stopped and watched me throw up everywhere
I'm just trying to find the strength to put my bra back on and come inside
Its 8 in the morning and I wouldn't pass a breathalyzer test, How's your day been?
Im just an angry damaged little elf who wanders around and tries to find drugs.
So I fucked a guy with his mouth wired shut last night never thought id cross that off my imaginary bucket list
Because of you I can never eat chicken nuggets without thinking of you fucking him. I hope youre happy. I really do.
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