Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
No she wasnt mad! I told her that I "mis-remembered" nailing her friend.
Just boiled hotdogs in bongwater. NOT a good idea.
I was living a snoop dogg song I fucked her on the floor so I wouldn't mess up my bed
My dad picked me up from the bus station and as soon as he saw me he yelled "bus backwards is SUB!" and started laughing, I'm like 800% sure he's stoned. I'm so happy I came home for spring break.
While I was sneeking out of her apartment, there was a giant cage with a parrot in it. I half expected it to squak "hit and run...hit and run."
you're right. a strip only looks good in porn . mine just looks like a fucked up mullet
I feel violated by Miley Cirrus's performance in the VMA's.
My inner pteradactyl is also confused.
Didn't pick classes because we were out all weekend...only open course is "alcohol and drug problems". Fucking ironic.
Its a shame I cant put 'bomb ass head game' on my resume.
Woke up with a padlock locked onto my ear gauge and the first of many sticky note clues on my chest leading to the key.
Idk, but the girl in his story had really nice eyebrows and was singing The Climb. How about you CLIMB the fuck away from my man
FORGET THE EYEBROWS
We could just go to Vegas and celebrate my singlehood and not contributing to the population.
We smell like vodka and hangover
Randomize
