It's not true, it's not true! She's too full of cheese to have sexy time!
I used the word aforementioned in my paper. That's an automatic A in community college.
I got a 69.7 in accounting. I have this whole doing the bare minimum down to a science
I was thinking Sara Jessica Parker was hot. That high.
I wish I could sell my textbooks directly to my drug dealer and cut out the middle man
I knew the only reason I bought a smartphone was to play "You're Havin My Baby" on the way to cvs to buy Plan B.
After all the hair products he's stolen from me, he better fucking be gay.
Just had a flashback of dry humping a man lying in the street while Jim (dressed as santa) screams 'HAVE YOU BEEN A GOOD BOY?!'
Just got attacked by a family of raccoons, I have the worst luck.
I don't even care that his girlfriend will be there. Us hooking up is a tradition and she will NOT ruin it.
I don't listen when you talk. I just try to find new creative ways to get you to send me naked pictures.
Can't a white girl just get drunk on a Sunday night and eat rice crispy treats. SHIT
She showed up after 3 hours and proceded to make us all feel like resonable human beings. I dont know how she did it but she did it.
Better not shit yourself at the gym.
Great, now I'm picturing myself as a fucking garden gnome
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