I hope God doesn't listen to everybody on a Saturday night.
Note: fake nails and fingering anus.... Not a good idea
Yeah. Fortunately, the road to Hell is paved with naked 21 year old girls.
Which beats the fuck out of good intentions.
my mom noticed the "toothpaste" stain on my tshirt...she repeatedly attempted to get it off by licking her thumb and rubbing it. See Jenn it obviously doesnt taste that bad...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i should have probably stopped drinking when my beer pong shots were hitting the other team in the face..
yeah thats usually a good indication.
im gonna make a bucket list just so i can cross off "underwater blowjob"
my left tit made it into the crop job on your profile pic, I knew it was good for other things
I specifically found a fat girl to lift me up on her shoulders.\n\nIt was glorious.
Kinda sad when you get home on a Sunday morning and the paper guy HAND DELIVERS the newspaper to you...,
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i meant to type that i went to that party for shits and giggles, but my phone corrected me and said for shots and goggles...either one works
I just got hit on at the bar by a guy who used his mother as a wingman, she was pretty convincing. Only in Stratford.
Really, who hasn't had sex on your bed?
ME.
Also I feel I should tell you last night when I came home I fell into my laundry hamper and woke up in a pile of my clothes
I really prefer to do my walks of shame in the summer
he's like the highest ranking tongue wizard i know.
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