Bike broken, reschedule party till thursday:(
yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
He slapped my ass and hummed the jello theme song, which was followed by an overly loud "IT'S ALIVE!"
woke up with withdrawal cold sweats this morning. spring break must really be over.
What's bad is when she said "what hobo did you steal this dick from?"
Kill yourself wednesday started off with a bang, and im pretty sure im still drunk from tequila tuesday.
We name dropped you at the liquor store and got a ten percent discount!
I don't go on dates. I watch tv and play with dicks. dinner is a situation.
i walked in on you eating. you had the fridge wide open and you were rotating between steak and handfuls of captain crunch.
I officially became the girl who let a guy get her off under the covers last night while her roommate and a friend were there. He was impressed by my ability to stay quiet and stay relatively focused on the conversation...
I am so ashamed of you, and yet so proud.
No, listening to the fray and drinking a bottle of jack daniels does not count as counseling
So the guy who is making our IDs is in jail now for attempted murder, with no bail...
So no fakes?
There's no such thing as shame in your world, is there?
Why would you keep yourself in a sharting situation
I deleted your number after I found out you gave my brother head for drugs.
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