we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
Someone will be leaving this trip either pregnant or devastated.
I just introduced him to multiple male orgasms. I love wine AND tequila
I've been watching anime, masturbating and eating nutella for three days. I hope she never comes back.
25 Of The Most Cringeworthy Internet Stalking Fails
That's what you said about that spiderman stripper, but look how that turned out
No. No, there is no forgiveness for this. The only way I'm forgiving you for this is if you somehow convince your sister to have sex with me. In her car.
I'm going on a valentine's date with the random guy i hooked up with in the bar bathroom this weekend...i feel like julia roberts
FALSE ALARM! I didn't piss myself, I fell asleep in the shower and then drunkingly crawled into my bed
Nothing bonds a father and daughter like washing her puke off the front steps
21 People Who Barely Escaped Death
Can't you just imagine you've grudge fucked me so we can get past this?
Did I mention I hooked up with another country star? I think I need some sort of trophy for each time, yah know? Or like a sash and I win a badge or patch for each person. Like a slutty Girl Scout.
sent a snap of my boobs out to my FWB his response was what happened to your other nipple ring.. how do I say it got ripped out by my other FWB last week without sounding like a slut
Packing for college has become a game of where did I hide my sex toys.
She doesn't even give a fuck about angle. I seriously gotta start doing like penis yoga or something.
I am NOT pregnant
My barren womb can FUCK WHOEVER I want