Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
I blacked out, fell off a swingset, and thought I was Liz Lemon for almost an hour.
she looks like stephen colbert with that blond wig he was wearing last night.
Sharpest. Poop. Ever.
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you kept lifting my skirt up, yelling "PANTY PARTY". needless to say, you're at the top of my father's shit list right now.
I bought my dad an absinthe brewing kit for christmas.. looks like tripping with my dad is in my near future.
She just sucked the buffalo sauce out of my beard. I've never been so disgusted and hard in my life.
You know it's a good party when even the dealers were too fucked up. Just found and counted 140 E pills I found in a bag in the couch. Just paid for weed this month.
Holy walk of shame. Fuck someone's house. I walked past a family eating their free continental breakfast wearing yesterday's makeup
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Dude between pissing everywhere and all of those frogs, that bathroom got wrecked.
Plus I'm pretty sure you said "love you" on the phone, so technically I should be putting you on some type of probation
Can't tonight. I'm supposed to get drugs for some college kids. Just doin my part in helping to enlight america's future
Wow I didn't even consider the possibility of him having ED. I'm gaining so many life experiences from dating an older man
They don't even know who I am but they just woke me up with maracas and invited my boobs to a kegger
stop falling asleep in the bathtub. you are not a movie star, you cannot die that way.