North Korea, Best Korea!
when i got home i made myself toast with butter & put pasta on it. I know this cause it's all over my bed.
he doesn't drink and he's an emt - he'll be our dd for nye in exchange for a threesome tomorrow afternoon.
I cant yet im literally covered in lube but I will later
Kate gave me a 3 day old cup of tequila last night and forced me to chug it. P.s. i drew u a picture
totally just got a week extension on my midterm by telling my prof that I had just found out I was adopted
If you're in the liquor store 5 minutes before close, and you have to ask the cashier for a coin to flip to make a life decision because "vodka takes you to a bad place," you need to reevaluate your life.
I thought that wasn't a thing ever since she showed you her vag on the dance floor
Just wanted to say a big ole FUCK YOU for coming out to mom the day before I have to drive with her for 6 hours. Ass hat.
Prepare for massive TMI but anyway long story short I have a Swiss flag band-aid across my balls.
What a patriot you are. How'd it happen?
some kid lit a j in the bar tonight. i was in awe of both his boldness and the severe beatdown he received moments later
Using the money underagers give me to buy this semesters books.. My mom would be so proud
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
Making friends with the guy who had alcohol-infused whipped cream was the best decision I made all night.
I was drunk, but not drunk enough to forget I had some dude on his knees begging for forgiveness.
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