Ambien does the same to me. One time that I took it, I got this huge bowl of spaghetti out of the fridge and thought it was a castle and that the meatballs were little slaves. I ate all of them first and then the noodles were the soldiers and the sauce was the water in the moat. And when I finished, I fell up the stairs and threw it all up.
Just saw a drunk guy marching down the strip with a garden rake. I feel compelled to follw him
100% of annual heatstroke fatalities are preventable deaths! Don't let it happen to you! Also, you can catch crabs from almost anything! Be safe and have fun.
There's always time for handjobs
We should reintroduce naked Mondays
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
We fucked in my trunk while on the clock....what did you do at work today?
Btw I'm currently writing a paper in a beer garden. Be proud.
Can you please come and collect your boss off of my kitchen floor.
We have a little not a lot. We already rolled a blunt and named him Ron.
He took me out, we slept together, and he sent me home this morning with fresh cantaloupe. #husbandstatus
Are cops allowed to hit on you if they're in uniform?! Serious question.
I'll get tired halfway through and end up passed out at a taco shack honestly
We discussed how many times we've passed out during sex. The answers may shock you.
Your ex spoke highly of your penis and it’s skill. I’m interested in learning more about it ;-)
Randomize
