it actually wasnt that awkward...i planned on saying hello and walking away..then she asked if i wanted to go to lunch and i looked at her chest and said absolutely
The only people who have said happy valentines day to me today have been 2 homeless people.
The bartender gave me the kids toys. Paddle ball & a gecko.
I tried to tell him I love him but it came out something like "We're both fucked up and it works."
when you wake up in a apartment hallway wearing someone else's shoes, you can pretty much assume last night was a success.
Ok roommate is officially weird. Just watched her microwave the same broccoli 3 times in a row and cry b/c she fucked it up. Wtf lol
You know I told you about that hammering at 3 AM yesterday? Turns out it was Holly beating the lock out of her door with a mallet because she'd forgotten her keys.
Doesn't she keep a spare?
Drunk Holly doesn't listen to Sober Holly's plans.
Made it just outside my dorm and yack on the front dirt. Wave to a dad thats staring, continue on my way.
I rather not break my neck. It's hard to look sexy with a neck cast.
I threw up in bed last night and tried cleaning it with oldspice and baby powder
Lol I wish they went straight to your cock then shot out into my mouth like a cock nacho dispenser
We did hand stuff while watching teenage mutant ninja turtles so I guess you could say it's getting serious
What happened last night dude?
YOU SHIT ON MY FUCKING COFFE TABLE THATS WHAT FUCKING HAPPENED!!!
My cats name is now jello shot. How much do you love me right now?
If I knew the person sucking my dick didn't say thank you for their Christmas presents I wouldn't be able to cum.
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