did i leave my keys in your car? BTW: sorry for throwing that drink on your date.
Ok I love you more. To infumty and beyong.
the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
So he said if we had sex he'd take me to Build A Bear. My virginity is so worth a trip to build a bear.
You're 20.
IT'S BUILD A BEAR!
A shower wasnt enough to wash off the shame but at least it took care off the blood.
Like, I just want to be naked rolling around in soft things.
I wore a firefighters hat and drank beer all night. They had to drive me home after breaking the beer pong table, they told me I was welcome back tonight though...
You have like just as much sex as me and I have a brand new bf. That does not add up. That is not right.
brushed my teeth nine times since getting home, still afraid there are pubes hiding in between my molars. fucking gummy bears
Then. Omg he showed me A CARD TRICK AFTER WE CAME
You humped everything and cried in an uber.
i put frozen meatballs in my drink thinking they were ice cubes and I'm vegetarian wtf
I almost stopped mid bj to let him know I appreciated his balls being nice to look at/have my face near. But I didn't know if that would ruin, or improve the moment.
IT'S FUCKING BABY SEASON ON FACEBOOK. MY VAGINA WANTS TO THROW UP
You abruptly started screaming because they had and I quote “calamari on the hoof”
Randomize
