im ready to get crazy and take my wig off
yo i just woke up i feel so weird, and the absolut is still fill, so is the 30, what the fuck did we drink last night man? And will you please come out of the bathroom.
Bro... we didn't even hang out last night??
pissed the bed twice, first one side then rolled over , other side. boom.
I just puked while everyone was releasing balloons. Im to hungover for this memoial service. Rest in peace great gramps.
I remember sucking his bleeding finger and then it's all black until he had his hand down my pants.
They called me at 5 AM saying they had a present for me
you flashed my boyfriend last night so i tackled you to the floor. you may be a bit sore.
Did strip banana grams actually happen last night
No one suspects that a sweet girl who is excited about her anniversary with her bf just blew her partner at work in a communal area a few hours ago, so its cool.
Date idea: we should go to the store and buy all the different kinds of Lay's and eat them all
I swear to god he's making pineapple onions and cheese. He thinks he's making eggs onions and cheese
Can you please explain to me why there are 7 bags of tacos in my bed?
driving home hungover today was like a life test..it was like the goblet of fire
When we became besties with benefits we agreed I could still get dick
I didn't think I'd have to specify "not my Dad"
HIGH AS FUCK. JUST WATCHED THE TRIPPIEST VIDEO EVER. IM NOT SCARED OF PANDAS. I GOTTA GO. TRIPPIN AGAIN
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