whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
forecast for tonight is alcohol, low standards and poor decisions.
i just heard a guy call his kid "Google" in a way that leads me to believe that's his name. this day couldn't get worse.
Dude i have a 6th sense for when bagel bites are ready.
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
I'm going to fuck my way out of the friend zone if its the last thing I do
IS FOOTBALL GONNA SUCK HIS DICK? NO, IT IS NOT
If I squint, he looks like Jude Law. But that's kind of a weird face to make during sex.
Do you remember snorting allspice and yelling at doughnut shop girl?
He just kept screaming "I have democratic immunity" as the cops dragged him into the car.
we just drove past a kid stuck in a tree what a wonderful time to be alive
i woke up in a bed of pop tarts
That moment when you sit down to shit and someone is watching porn on the other side of the wall.
Idk how much of a virgin he is but I'm tryna find out.
If I take one more surprise finger up the ass this week there will be hell to pay.
Randomize