You're completely useless in the revolution.
I caught myself masturbating while watching a baseball game today. It was over before I realized what was going on. And then I was just confused.
so we told my parents we were going trick or treating. got high as shit at some playground. and then bought our own candy so we looked legit when we got home.
The stoners next door have their couch on the sidewalk again, shirtless, soaking their feet in a baby pool and listening to loud ukulele music. I want their life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the fact that my dorm room overlooks a children's daycare is enough initiative for me to have safe sex.
He skyped me to learn how to roll a joint and for us to masturbate together. And you said a long distance relationship wouldn't work.
I was taking a bath and he burst in, sat down and started taking a shit. RIGHT BESIDE ME. My lack of privacy astounds me.
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
If I get over there and the april fools joke is that there's no HBO, I'm setting fire to the place.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
if you do the accent, i'll wear the eyepatch
Honestly and this might sound scary... But I want to get high and play with weapons
I wound up running down the street in 12 degree weather in just my bra and then fell asleep cuddling my bottle. You tell me how last night went.
just because you have a nice tits it doesn't make you a magic little snowflake.
I may or may not of seen my high school physics teacher making out with my old high school boyfriend at the bar last night
Way to fucking accidentally drunk dial me while you're talking to and buying other girls drinks. Don't call me.
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