just to let you know, don't open your linen closet for a while until i come over with a cleaning kit and geek squad
i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
I swallowed and made him pancakes in the morning. I feel almost as desperate as Jennifer Aniston at this point.
you wouldn't stop saying "oil can" in the tin man voice until I gave you back your flask
"Hung over, tired and having a faint scent of some body butter and random pieces of glitter from a girl named gigi, almost arrested in drug bust, $40 Canadian in my pocket and all i got was this lousy Tshirt" shirts dont exist, but they need to
Thanks for putting the blue stuff in the toilet, it made me throwing up this morning more enjoyable.
Thanksgiving break drinking is a marathon, not a sprint, and i need to be well rested
Dude, didn't you know? Its balls out wednesday.
Found a single cinnamon toast crunch between my butt cheeks. We did work last night
its sad im about to start saving up for how drunk i need to be for the holidays
Because its Monday... And I'm determined to just be drunk for the rest of the semester
You woke up, mumbled something about forgetting to lock the truck at work, slapped my ass, then passed out again...
Not saying I'm a lesbian. Just saying that every time she walks by I wanna scissor her
Broke my ankle and blacked out on my scooter last night. 'Twas grand.
so i might have slept on your bathroom floor last night...
Randomize
