never let anyone you met on skype borrow your car. lesson learned.
He just said "wow, thats some rly nice hair! And those teeth..thosee are some cool teeth"
ive decided something. ive accepted you as being gay. but i havent accepted you as a vegetarian yet.
I remember coming home with a cat... I havent seen it all day. Shit.
She got stuck in the front door. She never told me how or why.
Well it was 11am and we were walking to the market with red cups in our hands yelling NO JUDGEMENT at every car that passed
The cop was more concerned with the syringes on the dash board than looking for the source of the smoke. Thank god for diabetes!
I just feel like a girl who's never eaten a pb&j probably doesn't swallow
2nd fun fact: he has a square tan line around his dick.
Come over so we can hookup and eat tacos. Those are 2 things you can't possibly turn down.
i have officially banned the recreational use of bayonets.
It's a sit down to pee kind of hangover
I'm so happy I'm only on my second drink. That would have been the best idea ever if I was on my fifth.
His parents then knew me as the blackout who took care of him and stole his watch
jump out the window naked night went bad
Randomize
