so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
You finger a girl once and she thinks she loves you. I'm going back to boys. Lesbians are needy.
Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
Im at the zoo right now high out of my mind and feel as if the animals are watching me and Im the one in a cage.
making your facebook status TEQUILA is like basically saying "im easy tonight. feel free to take advantage"
rolled over to window for cup of snow instead of leaving bed for water. that's how hungover
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
He tried to cuddle with me after we hooked up and i just looked at him and said why are you still here?
on the way home I asked you what exit we get off at and your answer was "just like the goldfish"
He did a 4 wheel burnout and yelled at the cops "Sorry! It's for a school project!". HOW does he think of this shit?
The creepiest man is serenading me at the bar right now. I had about a quarter of a drink left and the bartender just walked over and filled it with vodka and walked away laughing.
I can't tell if this is a hangover or just a perfect combination of shame and regret
We've been fucking like crazy ever since she quit her job..ive been running errands all day to stay out of the house and give my dick a day of rest
I hate my life now
Hey I need you to run the morning meeting, for reasons I can explain when I find out where I left my car
Apologies that our conversations always turn to butt sex or penis size. I thought we out grew that in our 20's.
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