Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
Is it a little weird that I have a ridiculous urge to have sex while the theme song to the Pirates of the Carrbibbean blares in the background?
i'm home, then i'll come over
ightttt gangstaaaaaaaaaaaa
nvm.
Dude, you posted a cap of a porn to survey if it looked like me. That's pretty certifiably creepy.
My boss just gave me full permission to come into work wasted this weekend.
You are two creepy Justin Bieber quotes away from me not talking to you for the rest of the day
If I had a pelvic thrust emoticon, I would use it
I really need to stop coming home drunk and lint rolling my rabbit.
i could have sworn she did an overextended split with her legs over her head but now i think it was just the drugs
Did you leave a blizzard on my porch last night? Or was that someone else giving out a metaphorical threat to me?
I totally just somersaulted to the bathroom to avoid moving out of my fetal position
I don't know if I should be concerned or impressed.
So the contents found in my winter coats this year: coat 1, condom and 10$. Coat 2, condom and 75$ check. Coat 3, 2.05$ and a sunflower seed.
Obviously coat 3 had the best time since you used the condom and all of the money
I don't know but this 12 year old kid is soaking up all of our bad morals like a super tampon on the second day of my period
but we were going camping. it only made sense to bring the 6 ft bong
Started out playing table tennis then ended up fucking him on the table. Happy cinco de mayo
I need to get laid. Right now that freshman frat pledge & my Econ professor are the leading candidates
That’s quite a spread
Randomize