That level of neurosis does not find love outside of Grey's Anatomy.
Could guys at least pretend I require some amount of money to be spent before I randomly go down on them?
she said your name and I thought she was asking me to motorboat her. Best. Miscommunication.Ever.
What do you mean when you say no pre-party sex?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
OH GOD PAJAMAS ARE SUCH A HARD CONCEPT RIGHT NOW
Forgot to mention...Pamela Anderson has HPV, so i feel like im in good company
Just so everyone's clear, it was already on fire when I got there.
The only reason we got away with streaking last time was cuz we had those miner hats
I'm sorry I drunk dialed you before realizing that you were already in bed with me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm now drinking beer through a straw. By order of the bartender.
These freshman guys were trying to holler at me from their window, and I realized about 20 minutes too late that the best possible reaction at that time would've been screaming "FLACCID PENIS". Oh, and I found this awesome zombie charm bracelet you would love.
If I learned anything from that one time I saw the last 10 minutes of oprah when they talked about the secret, it is that you project what you receive back. I also have wine.
Okay, so is being determined to have my vagina licked by a woman on Valentine's day an acceptable goal?
I fucked a marine... I told him it was like personal revenge and he said he could live with that and that he didn't mind being used.
he was really really nice, and I did coke off of his dong that night too
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