Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
Some chick in the back of my Psychologhy of Addictions class just did a line off her hand. She tried to make it look subtle.
No matter what I do you still love me. It's like loving a retarded kid. A retarded kid that keeps trying to sleep with you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude, i warned you that using a card to pay for my hotel room was a bad idea. You deserve the extra $600 in cleaning fees
It's national boyfriend day supposedly, would it be appropriate if I posted a picture of my dildo?
At least I got to make out with you a little before you proposed.
I bought a vibrating wall dildo with my tax return. You?
You stopped making out with some rando guy to tell him you weren't sure about your sexuality then proceeded to follow me down the street to make out with me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your "whiskey dick" is glorious but also terrifying
Pretty sure I just got the ok to have a one night stand in Maui...from mom. I'd say that's a win in my book.
When a guy asks for your ig but you already know his blood type, social security number, & mother's maiden name.
Had to admit my broken elbow was caused by vodka, not hockey
What's the plan?
Not sure. I think I'll take a dump on his windshield.
Last time he showed up for Christmas he went on and on about backpacking somewhere and getting ghonnorreah twice.
Randomize