You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
your drunk ass trust falled a guy double fisting bud limes and as a result your head bounced off the patio table. So that might explain the stitches on the back of your head.
This is the second time in a week I've woken up with your bra in my bed and I've had to sit and think about how it happened.
I gave up yolo and cigarettes for lent. I owe god a sincere apology.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No. I just want to cuddle and talk about our feeling. Of course this a booty call.
Never backflip into an above ground pool. I think the gash will be smaller by Monday though.
Just so you know the unusual amount of skittles on your floor is entirely your own fault. You bought me 20 bags of them while I was high.
My hands are stained pink. I look like I fisted a muppet.
One failed naked backward somersault off the bed and I realize - I either need to drink less or workout more. Perhaps both.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Her tutu was on the floor and she wouldn't take off her crown. She kept saying you're fucking a princess!
Drinking hard cider in a room full of freshman girls. Never felt so secure of my manhood
I probably wouldn't
Booty called 3 guys from my hospital bed
If I walk downstairs and Kelly is fucking in the laundry room again I'm gonna die
Bring me your tired, your weary, your buffalo chicken dip
I'm just glad I met someone who probably won't punch you in the face
Randomize