You know what, matt, a girl is not really that interested in a relationship if she goes down on you the first time she meets you
Def ran into my elementary school babysitter at the grocery store. Still hot. And she complimented my beer choice. It feels good to still have her approval
It's official, I've know hooked up with everyone I carpooled with in middle school
If we both stop thinking about your penis for just a moment, we'd realize it is important and good that you are spending quality time with your family
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
found scuba porn. totally not sexy. life continues to disappoint.
Your lack of a response has proven you've clearly forgotten how crazy I am.
I'm going to join a nudist colony to win $1000. There are no down-sides to this.
in a thick russian accent she said "im not so good with english, much better with dick"
He also informed us that it's rude to shove your tit in someone's mouth. Happy Monday.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we were hooking up and then he goes "you can touch my penis" and i laughed too hard to do anything. no second date.
Bake him heart shaped cookies?!? Send him a picture of your tits like an ADULT!
I don't drink nearly as much when I'm coupled, and that's not a lifestyle I can commit to
Get the fuck in, we're going to Taco Bell.
You poured all their beer into ziploc baggies so it would be "better on the go"
we started drinking at 4pm, somehows its 1 am im in bathing suit running from the cops.....any explanation of what happened?
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