Dude I just witnessed a midget touching himself and singing the chorus to somebodys watching me by michael jackson... it kinda turned me on
Dude, we have the same penis size. Best friends for life.
I didn't notice until this morning that he had a six inch RAT TAIL...
I wish the holidays was like a drive thru. Get in. Get your presents. Get out.
I just made Jack Daniels snow cones.
It's not that he's ugly its just that being blind folded makes everything less awkward
I'll be there in spirit. Right there in your vagina.
Today's been pretty great, I went and bought the new Batman for the sole purpose of masturbating to Bane
Why do I have a bunch of cash....and your bra.
i repeatedly had to ask him if he was into this because he kept talking about random things while i jerked him off. i got annoyed and in order to annoy him back, i told him i wanted to watch him do it. he also talked about basketball WHILE cumming. NEVER AGAIN.
Wow! It's so great to hear from you! We all thought you perished in Winepocalypse 2012, man.
Pretty sure the guy at the Halloween party dressed as an ice cream man is working his way through the building without a care for gender or age. He high-fives me on his way out each morning.
We drank vodka and koolaid through a traffic cone. It got rowdy.
It doesn't count as "finding the lesbian" if you fuck a straight girl!
So, I need to know. Why did you spraypaint your underwear gold?
Randomize
