hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
i want to open my blinds to let the sunlight in my room, but i'm afraid my neighbors will be able to see me drinking and judge me
since i spend so many of my nights sleeping on the bathroom floor i think im going to remove all toiletries from under my sink and replace them with a pillow and blanket.
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
Life lesson. Learning to pee left handed is easier than learning brickbreaker left handed. Rather lose a few drops than a few lives
The chick working the drive through at BK on New Years stuck her head out the window and told me there were no line ups for the bathrooms inside so i should go in there. I just kept squatting and peeing and told her it would prob help business.
I will no longer accept being cock blocked in my own bed.
Wtf are freshmen gonna think when the first thing they see in a pale 6'4 white kid with a mustache yelling ya man and we be liming in a Trinidadian accent
Did you fuck him in my garden last night?
That WOULD explain the dirt in my vagina
So we played the stone cold theme song and continued to chug 2 beers at once and everyone just looked in shock
Downloaded the Pocket Penguin app. There are now penguins living in my phone. Technology is wonderful.
You were so high that you only FaceTimed me so that you could stare into your own eyes and not actually say anything
should we try and roll a cross joint since its good friday? you know, for jesus
I wonder if go pro can customize a cock ring so I don't have to hold the camera anymore
in the future we should consider sippy cups so we can drink and passout accordingly
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