I faked an abortion last night.
operation harelip BJ is a go
Hands down the most disgusting picture message ever received. Thank you.
im here for your entertainment
We called dibs on each other's genitals. That bond is unbreakable.
Well she described you as a "Sex-Viking", which seemed to be only slightly related to the red beard. So things are looking good!
I cried over the lack of milkshakes I've consumed in the last month
my life could not get any worse. just saw my sister in a porno
Grab some lube and condoms and you get a free shirt? College is weird
Yeah but if you conceived a child on a park slide that would be pretty awesome
Nobody likes ball hair. Not even gay dudes
If you don't believe in my fighting skills, I don't know if we can be together
I heard you ran into my sister lastnight. Do you remember making out with her and slapping my uncle?
slept with a 6'5 mountain man from Montana and then he played 'Girls Just Wanna Have Fun' on repeat..
You know its a good night when ur woken up by the bartender asking you how he ended up at your house
Wait, you met him on Onlyfans? The guy from last night? Which one of you is the fan?
Because one of you banged your stalker
Randomize
