People in love make me want to vomit
its likemy ribs anf my hesrt aew cuddlingn
i yelled at him for a little and we ended up fucking in a random tennis court.
There are at least 3.6 billion human cocks in this world. Get some. Get as many as humanly possible. Literally. Do it. 1-2-3 go!
Would you be offended if I asked you to smoke a blunt with me while I pooped?
how was it?
he was petting the bushes because they were "napkins"
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
The fact that you're allowing Santa to dry hump your ass is sort of a dealbreaker
my head feels like a yellow yolk spinning in a circle at the bottom of the bowl.. i may have a concussion, love auto correct
I thought my life was going to shit but then I read about Amanda Bynes and I realize it's not so bad
The George Foreman grill is melted. I don't know what other problems could arise.
I'm drunk and I have your birth certificate
He told me to prepare for his "Jurassic cock" and I had to leave the room from laughing.
I guess there's no delicate way to say "I'm 90% sure I sucked his dick in the bathroom of the bar."
Third time this week I've caught co workers dry humping. Quarantine really changes people's priorities.
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