so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
Its a sad day when your bush has a better set of hair than you do
These 3 days between Christmas and new years when all the bosses are on vacation are essentially a competition to see who can do the least amount of work
Either seal the deal or get out of the room, I don't want to hide in this closet anymore
Of course... Double fistin nati light cuz the powers out and it cuts down the times i gotta open the fridge... Genius
Btw I'm currently writing a paper in a beer garden. Be proud.
On a completely unrelated note I think I have carpal tunnel
Again, totally unrelated
the 5 D's of Dodgeball literally just saved my life
Just found some confetti on my nipple if that's any indicator of how the night went
they saw the dick pic he sent and started calling him 'subway'
I woke up like how did I get here this blanket is nice but it was just the curtain
According to the boxer briefs I found on the couch when I got home, I take it your date went well??
I think I've been there, but who knows? I drink a lot
I brought an already opened bag of trail mix from home to snack on today. Some motherfucker ate all the m&ms out of it. I hate my roommates
Why would I want a relationship when I’m the side dick for my boss and a few women from the gym
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