He played with my vagina like it was a turntable
why would she cut her hair? she needs all the distractions possible from those texas-sized gums and horse teeth.
You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
my Econ professor just passed around his phone for us to take a pic of ourselves so he could learn our names. I am currently looking him up on my sex offenders app.
i actually have a tan line from him holding my boob while we were sunbathing
The fact that he grabbed my boob in the middle of the conversation shows something needs to change
apparently the bartender would rather give me free shots than tell me that my whole nipple piercing was hanging out
Either I put my underwear on inside out and wore it like that all day, or I had sex with him. Its sad I have to guess.
I actually didn't mind her sub-par blowjob skills.. It took me back to a time when skipping class was noticed, and my liver didn't look like a worn out shoe
you said I shouldn't try to fill the void in my meaningless life with dicks but i am trying and it totally works
Incase you were wondering. Cooking naked turns into sex. Sex and cooking may lead to house fire....
I'm just to the point my give a fucks is so far in the red that I'm going to have to take out a 30yr loan of fucks to repay it
You sat on me. Like I was a toilet. While I was on the toilet. You peed a little.
I'm sitting naked on my bathroom floor and it remind me of us.
That's my way of saying I miss you
I love you too, but sadly you're not as good at getting me out of bed as cocaine.
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