he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
Just saw 30+ dicks. Explain later.
So he handed us the weed then asked us if we needed any papers. And she goes "i dont know what that means, do we need to sign something?"
she won't be coming home tonight because she tried stealing a baby giraffe from the zoo
btw i have an angry voicemail of you yelling at me to get you a sandwich or die.
it was like watching bambi learning to walk, if bambi was 22 and a high functioning alcoholic.
You just kept walking around saying "my brain is soup" then sat on the kitchen counter washing your feet. You bit the guy that tried to help you down
ur not supposed to find someone to make out with when ur bf takes u to his SISTERS house to hang out with her and her husband
Chill out, I'm getting ready as fast as I can. I didn't even masturbate in the shower.
Your stories are the best. I feel like you're a spy among the heteros. It's not fair.
Lusting after Beyonce when you're a lesbian is like having a crush on Jesus. You just don't do it.
I'm pretty sure the Jahovah's witness only came to our door because the front says "Twerk Or Treat"
I almost tased myself
I dont think you should own that device.
It's an awesome device. I love this device.
Who put my cat in the fridge?
The sex was so good we high-fived after.
Randomize
