being alone eating nachos and drinking from a giant munchen beermug really isnt that sad
I wish I could rewind to my 8th birthday instead. I wanna wake up, eat as much cake as I want, and have a Transformers birthday party without someone judging me.
We got three kegs and a backhoe. Now taking bets on what charges we end up getting arrested for. Will need bail money.
We didn't have a blender for the margaritas, so she tried to use the garbage disposal and wasted half a handle of my grandpa's good tequila.
Just got home and found him passed out with his ass stuck in a Rubbermaid garbage can. He must have been like that for a few hours
Saw you fall down on Jefferson and a cop drove by and shook his head. How you didnt get arrested after the party you went to on saturday is beyond me.
I'm gonna go to bars and pick up women hopped up on democracy.
Also, sex on a first date is no, right? Really, I just don't want to clean my apartment, but I'm trying to hide behind "morals" in an effort to appear less lazy.
Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
I can't help that I bring out the sex in people
I have a to do list for the summer and thing one is figuring out my sexual orientation
If you could not mention to him that I slept with his best friend, that'd be cool of you.
you bleached my bangs. i have an interview later today and you assholes bleached my bangs.
I dont understand why so many people are content staying in and avoiding alcohol and sex
How naked do you want me to be?
Randomize
