How is your vagina???
Double booked
With your butt?
Totes, candlesticks and all
Yay!!
I remember having a drink with vegetables in it. They said it was a mojito, but it tasted like cabbage.
haha i love mojitos
ya and i hate cabbage
i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
I think its only fitting my first purchase with my student loan is a glass pipe? I think ill name it 'Subsidized'
I found him. We're on the way back to the condo. He was sitting in the lifeguard stand letting people passing by take pictures of his nipples for a buck each..he made 15 dollars
I take back all of the insults I've ever said toward those money makers
Consider it an appointment to improve my blow job capabilities.
You know it's been awhile when the imagery of fucking AT A DENNY'S gets me really turned on.
LinkedIn just suggested I might know the guy I caught my wife fucking.
Glass of stolen champagne in a to go cup = tastiest hangover cure ever
He walked in wearing nothing but a WWF belt and yelled "THE CHAMP... IS... HEEERE!!!"
Friday is the holy day of drinking. Thou shalt observe the Sabbath. It's in the bible. Look it up bitch.
Come eat Chinese buffet and watch us trip on acid. It'll be fun.
I'm both gender and math confused
I miss your drunken presence, and strong odor of hard liquor and potent weed.
I woke up with an eye patch on, someone else's sweatshirt on, and no pants on. I hope it was a good night.
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