If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
It's sad that he has such a beautiful cock and doesn't know what to do with it.
I think my penis and your vagina just became best friends last night.
He came on my chest. Sat back and said "hey it sorta looks like lake michigan!" kill me now...
She was doing lines off of her friends boobs in the limo at 9 oclock on a thursday This has the potential to be the best weekend ever
If I remember who won the superbowl tomorrow morning.. I think I'm just going to quit drinking. There really won't be a point anymore
He had a tramp stamp of his own phone number. You can't tell me that isn't smart.
I'm just gonna go with where the wind takes me. if it takes me to his dick, so be it.
So you told me to remind you that you vomited 3 times in the street because you would forget so here is your reminder
we need to find a way to be drinking champagne 24/7
Two things. 1) party at my house this Friday 2) what was the name of the Australian you fucked on the cruise ship?
Also, full disclose I puked in a fruit barrel box
hey at least you are getting hit on, i spent all day researching cat sedatives
I got my period during my acid trip. It was weird.
Whenever someone said no you would yell "Die Motherfucker." Kind of like some twisted drinking game.
Randomize
