He told me all about his plan for proposing to his girlfriend as pillow talk.
he just came in and straightened the chair and left again
i just wasnt prepared to have the baby of one of two french firemen. threesomes are too confusing.
Now accepting hypotheses about how i managed to get a bruise between my boobs....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He came to my Harry Potter marathon wearing a Hogwarts uniform. Of course I fucked him.
He seems like a super lonely dude. I bet if I gave him a picture of my tits he wouldn't make me turn in this paper.
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
Hey, thanks for not calling the cops when I answered the door naked, high as fuck, and covered in red velvet cake batter.
Your life is quite full of dick lately.
It really is!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Am I required to send a Christmas card to my fuck buddy?
Also. Picked being late to work over the maid finding my vibrator. Life choices....
You know its an epic night when omar the garbage man gives you a ride home at 6 in the morning.
we finally found him at 2 am. he was 3 miles from the house and tried running into the lake when he saw us pull up. i don't think he'll be taking ecstacy again any time soon.
Played Gay Bar on the jukebox and pissed off the Republicans here. Best day before birthday ever.
Yeah. I got a Tetnus shot then partied like it was 1999.
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