Seriously dude, you need to stop beating off to the ellen show, it's just weird.
it actually wasnt that awkward...i planned on saying hello and walking away..then she asked if i wanted to go to lunch and i looked at her chest and said absolutely
let me put this in terms we both understand. he was the crunchwrap supreme of men--the perfect combo of all things manly, gooey and delicious. and ready for instant enjoyment.
he'll be my respectable boyfriend for tksgiving and i'll be his non-slutty girlfriend for christmas.
and then ....
he stays my gay friend and my parents think i'm not a slut.
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I should have questioned it early on when they said bring beer and chocolate syrup
Is it cheating if its a threesome? This is more like a party game than infidelity.
We could have casual sex if you want. But I can't offer a bromance to a woman.
Yo if you blacked out last night, careful going through your purse. There's cocaine in a lollipop wrapper.
I woke up with a massive hangover and realized I still had an entire bottle of tequila in my car...so yeah, working on tomorrow's hangover.
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I'm getting a collar when he gets back in to town! That's like the bdsm equivalent of getting his class ring!
So I just went to clothing optional bar
I'm at her wedding and she managed to get every single one night stand I ever had in her wedding party. Why does she hate me?
Ran into my FWB on my walk of shame and went back to her place. Even my walk of shames are awesome!!!
Best part though was when he wanted to cuddle and I was like, I'm going to go.
It was just a hint of nipple. I kept it classy!
Do you even hear yourself?
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