thought so. i woke up and he was playing with my eyeliner. I MAKE GREAT CHOICES.
At Coney Island the sign for the rollercoaster The Cyclone says, "Make sure your glasses and weave are secure."
Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
she was talking to me but i could help but stare at the extremely long hairs on her boobs. then she says, "your looking at the hair on my boobs aren't you"
You wanted to speak to the manager of mcdonalds as to why a "bag of cheeseburgers" isn't a menu option.
I just deleted all the drug dealers from my phone, I guess this is growing up
It's been decided..lingerie is an investment. You get free breakfast and cab rides out of it.
Note to self: Don't go home with a recent divorcee. Semen and tears.
Topenga is going to be back on TV. Finally my fantasy of her being a milf in junior high has come full circle.
I'm taking myself to the hospital right now b/c there is no way this erection is subsiding in the next 4 hours.
You said you couldn't look at me because you would have to take off your sunglasses but you can't because they're the "guides to your eyes".
No dude. I can't think of anything LESS sexy than yodeling
I'm just blindly tossing my dick into whatever comes my way.
This is not a drill. I need a cape. And a tuxedo. Simultaneously. Repeat. NOT. A. DRILL....
I got home and he was wearing a suit. He said he reason was because it was shirt and tie Saturday and that he won't change until midnight. He then proceeded to answer the door in a British accent.
Randomize
