You're not pinnochio. Lying isn't going to make it bigger.
I got to the point where it seemed like she had 8 giant breasts instead of just two
I kept pulling the $1 bills off the stage and told everyone "no no no she has to work for this money"
my co-worker, his best friend who also works with us, an my baby daddy, ive turned love triangle into a retarded shape with to many sides to pronounce
I don't know what you're talking about. I just drank beer out of my own bellybutton by doing a backbend and letting it run down my body.
I'm studying for my midterm by watching porn with Spanish subtitles. Surprisingly the words are still really distracting..
i'm hungover but need to study so i had a vodka orange juice, three ibuprofen and an adderall for breakfast. what up med school
Honestly it's a super power. I can try it a million different ways and nothing happens. Donnie casually says "ok this is now a toppless party" and it all kicks-off
40s are totally the cure
Nope. I've found you care about two things in life: your momma and spreading your seed.
I make him buy me all the extremely expensive high end Mac cosmetics I desire. Wear it then let him cum on my face. I am fucking glamorous.
Regardless of how one feels after a break up, whiskey must be consumed.
Is it disrespectful or patriotic to pole dance on an american flag pole?
We left Waffle House and he took off running five miles down the road saying we were "training for the Olympics." And I mean, I couldn't leave him out there like that...
Im so unlucky if I fell in a barrel of dicks, I'd come our sucking my thumb
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