The smartest thing I've heard Obama do is call Kayne West a jackass
and she said "My body is an orphanage, I take everybody in"...
The cop only confirmed I'm .22% Irish. Then I threw up on him.
i am positive it's ok to drink. it's just pieces of the plastic knife i forgot was in the blender.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So does it count as really great road-head if he ran over 3 mailboxes before realizing he was off the road?
It's like you are the superhero of getting jizzed on
Just had a shirt made that says "I'm sorry" going to wear it every sat and sun morning for the foreseeable future
I'm sitting on the toilet just to avoid my bosses look of disapproval
Can I also remind you that we insisted on touching his mustache?
Well of course I remember it took up like 20 minutes of my night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No one parties "Full Karen". She once broke a couple up at the bar, ate the girl out in the bathroom and took the guy home.
Boobs have been pretty central in my life somehow lately which makes me question if I am truly gay
I mean I just feel if I'm not being fat and lazy then I'm not really being myself
You were wearing a sequin mini, with Tevas. And you still got laid.
i looked at my texts in the morning and saw that i had a full conversation with myself via text thinking it was someone else. i rejected myself
Have you actually looked at the corn flakes box? I don't think the rooster has a soul.
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