I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
People kept wishing me happy birthday last night. apparently i was 21st birthday drunk
i thought i was the drunkest one there til some girl puked in the tip jar.
That bus ride was like a tour of all the bushes I puked behind last night
it was my 21st birthday. took an old mans walker so i could stay till last call. reasonable right?
if that dog is afraid of alcohol then he's no dog of mine
To justify your stumbling you just kept yelling 'it's the boat, not the drinks' We hadn't even left the dock yet....
I guess I really am the only person in this world who can successfully have a no-strings-attached threesome on the beach.
Golf group in front of us has 2 hooker caddies. One guy was getting a lap dance as he waited to tee off. Only in vegas.
I am his drunk Jesus. I will love him from afar because he's my little lamb
The CEO is puking on the sidewalk and the HR director just offered me coke. Engineers have the best parties
He got you flowers. How bad can the sex really be?
Dude, I'm thinking today is Single as Fuck Friday because that's how I'm feeling
I think I just got drunk texted by my psychiatrist
This may be the most redneck thing I've ever said, but I know all there is to know about farting dogs
Randomize
