I'm in your bed right now
Okay meet you there give me 10
Don't think you can make me leave either
Give me ten I ha e to be ******'s wingman I want you
She's the rare girl who loses weight and gets uglier.
I've been watching too much manswers. Cuz i know scissoring doesn't work on a motorcycle.
Ok I might come if this chair quits being so great...I'm also seeing this bush in the corner turn into a witch
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I swear I could audibly hear her vagina slam shut when you walked up to hit on her.
You threw up with your ski mask on still.
Jameson and I invented street rugby last night. Yeah
We got kicked out of the ice rink last night for drinking and checking strangers... but they let us keep the beer
My Bio teacher gave me extra marks for putting "deer with AK-47 seeking retribution" at the top of the food chain on my exam. 51% pass here i come!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have a fannypack full of condoms and acid. Let's get weird.
I like to oil my gears with cheap vodka and strangers
I’m pregaming Christmas shopping with grandma. What’s up?
Yah. I'm gonna lay you down and feed you grapes, except I'm gonna replace grapes for my balls
Its mothers day... Can my present be an orgasm...for once?
I only have sex with you to have a memory to masturbate to.
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