I like bacon cheeseburgers and the pussycat dolls
Does that mean you want me to loosen up your buttons at carls jr?
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
You came on your own forehead. Just wanted to remind you that.
hey..i found a takeout box with a half-eaten hamburger in it, the box said to text this number if found...
now that you've tased me I refuse to buy you flowers
Idk. I'm naked in front of the computer eating ribs. All is right with the world.
That's so nerdy and hot at the same time.
He drew a bath for me. It was only cute until he started throwing in celery and calling me soup.
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
TGIFridays...stall number 1...drunk...send help
I fell asleep giving a handjob, had a sex dream about giving a handjob, and woke up giving a handjob. Life.
Is it tacky to frame a negative pregnancy test?
Let this be a lesson to you, parmesan cheese crumbles are not a good substitute for coffee creamer, no matter how high you are
We can use the Mac n cheese as the potatoes in our breakfast burritos. Problem solved.
I like that they’re all named Christopher or Chris. No need to worry about moaning during!
Randomize
