At a stoplight watching a woman push groceries in a stroller while dodging oncoming traffic... Reallllly Detroit?
6 figure salary? he just got a little cuter.
how lazy do you have to be to be a fat vegetarian?
can you come get me at the bar
ill be there in 10 min
can we stop off at build a bear on the way home
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
First day at work... I clogged up the office toilet on purpose to assert my dominance.
well my dad not being home definitely made it less awkward to walk in carrying the bra I left wearing.
Just ran into that guy that tried to take a dump in your pool
I can't wait till we are old and wrinkly and I can turn to you and ask, "Remember when you Rick Jamesed the shit out of that couch??"
Lets get coked out and steal a parrot this summer
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This girl I interned with got engaged today and I'm just like over here taking plan B with my tacos and PBR.
I walked out in my coconut bra, and that's when it all went downhill.
I AM A SEXUAL NIGHTMARE
Dude... the time we have in life to be young and trivial is so incredibly short. I think we should drink tonight.
There is eyeliner on my toilet. Vodka and I have a love hate relationship.
Weird. And pubic lice are now endangered so your hairy balls can rest easy
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