And then she started grabbing onto random guys legs, asking their names, and if they wanted to be friends... Haha, I love when the girls my ex's are dating are total drunken whores.
you came home covered in oatmeal wearing a tutu holding a stolen wrotting pumpkin and "its a girl" balloons tied around your neck.you were whispering the lyrics to aaron carters 'aarons party'. i think the real question was what DIDNT you drink last night
She was the most uninteresting drunk I've met
just had to re-breakup with her. it was like shooting a dead horse that was crying and talking.
You should know that Team Beyonce's Vagina dominated in pong last night
I like how he had to correct himself in stating that I was the fat one in the threesome.
we went from five shot glasses to three in one night. we lost 'badass' and gumbi, but the ninja turtle survived. courtney says to avoid any more casualties we're not allowed to use shot glasses past 1am. and we're not allowed to throw them
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
A dude I dated in high school just put a status about National Coming Out day. I checked his relationship status. He is dating a dude. Hello, Friday.
I'm so excited you texted me but I'm way to high to process it
i got home safe but then alex started a fire so now we're at the hospital
Just wanted to share my unfortunate vagina news in the hopes that it would make your vagina feel better about itself.
He howled at the moon then told me that if i were a dog he'd have sex with me...either i look like that girl or i need to stop going on blind dates. Period.
QUICK FAX ME THE BALL
Not how faxing works at all btw
Unfortunately the rum ran out midway through our viewing and we had to suffer in silence for the rest of it.
Randomize
