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Tell her she can't have a vagina
So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
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He asked what my name was on facebook chat. IT SAYS RIGHT THERE. i will never be drunk enough for this guy.
it's so much work when my dad takes my car to get fixed, i had to take out the bottles, condoms, and my pipe
Listening to Joy Division and applying for Walmart. You get to choose which one is more depressing.
He's only a little bit crosseyed.
I think this is one situation where "a little bit" doesn't mean much.
He told me his penis would be a "Sad Panda" if I didn't give it a ride through the jungle.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My vagina and my morals are playing tug of war
He was having an allergic reaction to that new brand of vodka Eric brought, so he just started chasing with benadryl.. Talk about commitment.
She just texted me that she's horny, then started quoted random music, then telling me everything she regrets. I don't think there's enough tequila in the world for me to deal with her...
You know in a few years she's gonna look like her mom. So if you're gonna hit that you better do it while she still looks like somebody else.
Holy high batman
The hairdryer was like a fuckin obstacle course
I don't want my vagina anymore.
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